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Jul. 12th, 2011
AHAHAHA WTF KIND OF ENDING WAS THAT, QUEER AS FOLK?
TV series don't just do that. Well, maybe weird ones like Life on Mars, but you, show, never gave any indication of this - and it's SO DAMN COOL. I'm a little bit in awe and a little bit extremely amused.
TV series don't just do that. Well, maybe weird ones like Life on Mars, but you, show, never gave any indication of this - and it's SO DAMN COOL. I'm a little bit in awe and a little bit extremely amused.
a retrospective
Jul. 12th, 2011 03:53 pmToday is my last day in Durham. I won't say my last day in England, because I'll come back, but it's still the end of something big, and I guess it's time to look back on this year.
Unexpected things
1) I was sure that I would be homesick often and badly, and that I would have to work hard to keep myself happy. Mainly that's because of Australia, and the way things went there, but now more than ever I think that what went wrong in Australia must have been depression caused by actual physiological/hormonal stuff, rather than homesickness. Because here I didn't feel homesick once. Occasionally I wished my friends were around, or had a sudden longing to see my pets, but I never thought 'I want to go home so badly, nothing else matters'. I was as content here as I am at home when I'm feeling good and happy.
2) Living with strangers was not at all a problem for me. I'm a very private, reserved person, and an only child on top of that, and I thought for sure that I would feel self-conscious and uncomfortable around the people I'd live with. But instead it turned out to be one of the most interesting aspects of my stay in Durham, and for the most part, I enjoyed living with my flatmates. To a huge extent I think this was because of the cultural differences - I don't feel self-conscious around people from a completely different culture, apparently. And the food was great ;)
3) British food and British weather: don't quite deserve their bad rep. The cold, snowy winter was annoying but also great, spring and fall were quite sunny, and only this summer is a bit on the rainy side. It is much colder up in the north, though. British food could do with less beef and grease, and occasionally more spice, but mostly I liked it.
4) Uni: a lot more work-intensive and interesting than previous ERASMUS exchange students led me to believe. This was a good thing, because I'm usually happy when uni forces me to work.
5) I didn't change much. Perhaps I'm too old for it already, but I don't think this year changed me much in the way I've seen it with some other people who went abroad and came back very different.
6) Lizzie, the girl from Heidelberg who also went to Durham this year, and who in the beginning I didn't like very much, pretty much became my best friend here. We might have become even closer friends if she hadn't met Alex, her English girlfriend, but still it was good to have a replacement for the very close friends I have at home (I'm not very good with loose acquaintances).
7) The fact that there WAS a language barrier and I did feel like a foreigner a lot - in fact, I have never felt so German while living in Germany. Not in a bad way, as I said, I enjoy cultural differences and I was often amused and surprised by the things people knew and said about Germany (or in the case of my flatmates, Europe and the Western World). I think I now understand immigrants a lot better, which is never a bad thing.
Regrets
1) Of course to some extent I wish I hadn't gone to England this year. I could have gone last year, or the year before that, and my father wouldn't have died while I was away. I also deeply regret that I didn't call him more often, or say nicer things to him when I did. I don't grieve anymore, but the regrets will stay.
2) I wish I had made more of an effort to befriend people who weren't Elisabeth and my flatmates, because once uni stopped, I hardly had any contact to actual English people. And I might have found someone to travel with more.
3) I wish I had learned Mandarin, which I totally could have done, since Durham offers beginners courses. What a missed opportunity!
4) I wish I had gone to a proper college formal, and got a rental gown for the one event at the beginning of the year where I could have worn one.
5) As the year went on, I started regretting my decision to go to Durham a bit - maybe I should have listened to the people who told me to go to London (not least of all my boss, who lived there for nearly a decade before going back to Germany). I've grown very fond of the North, but if I could choose again, I would pick London.
Fond memories
1) I'll always fondly remember my first trip to Edinburgh in winter, and the trips to London I made this spring, the two days in Bath, the Isle of Skye, the long walks I took in Durham county, the evening walks through Durham with my flatmates, eating lunch by the river or with Lizzie in Gregg's bakery...
2) My attempts to participate in Durham's nightlife, from the Gamesoc socials to that first time I tried to go out with my flatmates (their shocked expressions at the noise level in a disco!) or Europe's Worst Nightclub and the stupid fooling around with Elisabeth's flatmate whose name I still don't know, but also the tea and cookie Wednesday nights at the international students meetings.
3) The two special topic courses and their great atmosphere, which were some of the nicest uni experiences I've had.
4) My room - tiny, and rather ugly without decoration, but I felt so very comfortable here. It somehow felt more like I owned this room than living at home has ever done - probably because I paid the rent ;)
5) Brilliant Asian homecooked food, from the giant feast that was Chinese New Year to weird unidentifiable herbal remedies and soups that made my mouth tingle for hours. I wish I could have reciprocated better, but unfortunately most of the stuff I CAN cook is mediterranean rather than German. I don't know how often I had lasagna this year...
6) Just generally living in England - thanks to fandom and British television and studying English Lit, it's a country that I knew and loved before ever coming here, and sometimes the smallest things would make me happy just because they were British.
I'll leave you with a (very random) piece of Geordie wisdom - the local dialect, not the guy from TNG - which I can transcribe only insufficiently because it's best shouted while drunk:
Shy bairns get nowt.
Unexpected things
1) I was sure that I would be homesick often and badly, and that I would have to work hard to keep myself happy. Mainly that's because of Australia, and the way things went there, but now more than ever I think that what went wrong in Australia must have been depression caused by actual physiological/hormonal stuff, rather than homesickness. Because here I didn't feel homesick once. Occasionally I wished my friends were around, or had a sudden longing to see my pets, but I never thought 'I want to go home so badly, nothing else matters'. I was as content here as I am at home when I'm feeling good and happy.
2) Living with strangers was not at all a problem for me. I'm a very private, reserved person, and an only child on top of that, and I thought for sure that I would feel self-conscious and uncomfortable around the people I'd live with. But instead it turned out to be one of the most interesting aspects of my stay in Durham, and for the most part, I enjoyed living with my flatmates. To a huge extent I think this was because of the cultural differences - I don't feel self-conscious around people from a completely different culture, apparently. And the food was great ;)
3) British food and British weather: don't quite deserve their bad rep. The cold, snowy winter was annoying but also great, spring and fall were quite sunny, and only this summer is a bit on the rainy side. It is much colder up in the north, though. British food could do with less beef and grease, and occasionally more spice, but mostly I liked it.
4) Uni: a lot more work-intensive and interesting than previous ERASMUS exchange students led me to believe. This was a good thing, because I'm usually happy when uni forces me to work.
5) I didn't change much. Perhaps I'm too old for it already, but I don't think this year changed me much in the way I've seen it with some other people who went abroad and came back very different.
6) Lizzie, the girl from Heidelberg who also went to Durham this year, and who in the beginning I didn't like very much, pretty much became my best friend here. We might have become even closer friends if she hadn't met Alex, her English girlfriend, but still it was good to have a replacement for the very close friends I have at home (I'm not very good with loose acquaintances).
7) The fact that there WAS a language barrier and I did feel like a foreigner a lot - in fact, I have never felt so German while living in Germany. Not in a bad way, as I said, I enjoy cultural differences and I was often amused and surprised by the things people knew and said about Germany (or in the case of my flatmates, Europe and the Western World). I think I now understand immigrants a lot better, which is never a bad thing.
Regrets
1) Of course to some extent I wish I hadn't gone to England this year. I could have gone last year, or the year before that, and my father wouldn't have died while I was away. I also deeply regret that I didn't call him more often, or say nicer things to him when I did. I don't grieve anymore, but the regrets will stay.
2) I wish I had made more of an effort to befriend people who weren't Elisabeth and my flatmates, because once uni stopped, I hardly had any contact to actual English people. And I might have found someone to travel with more.
3) I wish I had learned Mandarin, which I totally could have done, since Durham offers beginners courses. What a missed opportunity!
4) I wish I had gone to a proper college formal, and got a rental gown for the one event at the beginning of the year where I could have worn one.
5) As the year went on, I started regretting my decision to go to Durham a bit - maybe I should have listened to the people who told me to go to London (not least of all my boss, who lived there for nearly a decade before going back to Germany). I've grown very fond of the North, but if I could choose again, I would pick London.
Fond memories
1) I'll always fondly remember my first trip to Edinburgh in winter, and the trips to London I made this spring, the two days in Bath, the Isle of Skye, the long walks I took in Durham county, the evening walks through Durham with my flatmates, eating lunch by the river or with Lizzie in Gregg's bakery...
2) My attempts to participate in Durham's nightlife, from the Gamesoc socials to that first time I tried to go out with my flatmates (their shocked expressions at the noise level in a disco!) or Europe's Worst Nightclub and the stupid fooling around with Elisabeth's flatmate whose name I still don't know, but also the tea and cookie Wednesday nights at the international students meetings.
3) The two special topic courses and their great atmosphere, which were some of the nicest uni experiences I've had.
4) My room - tiny, and rather ugly without decoration, but I felt so very comfortable here. It somehow felt more like I owned this room than living at home has ever done - probably because I paid the rent ;)
5) Brilliant Asian homecooked food, from the giant feast that was Chinese New Year to weird unidentifiable herbal remedies and soups that made my mouth tingle for hours. I wish I could have reciprocated better, but unfortunately most of the stuff I CAN cook is mediterranean rather than German. I don't know how often I had lasagna this year...
6) Just generally living in England - thanks to fandom and British television and studying English Lit, it's a country that I knew and loved before ever coming here, and sometimes the smallest things would make me happy just because they were British.
I'll leave you with a (very random) piece of Geordie wisdom - the local dialect, not the guy from TNG - which I can transcribe only insufficiently because it's best shouted while drunk:
Shy bairns get nowt.
a retrospective
Jul. 12th, 2011 03:53 pmToday is my last day in Durham. I won't say my last day in England, because I'll come back, but it's still the end of something big, and I guess it's time to look back on this year.
Unexpected things
1) I was sure that I would be homesick often and badly, and that I would have to work hard to keep myself happy. Mainly that's because of Australia, and the way things went there, but now more than ever I think that what went wrong in Australia must have been depression caused by actual physiological/hormonal stuff, rather than homesickness. Because here I didn't feel homesick once. Occasionally I wished my friends were around, or had a sudden longing to see my pets, but I never thought 'I want to go home so badly, nothing else matters'. I was as content here as I am at home when I'm feeling good and happy.
2) Living with strangers was not at all a problem for me. I'm a very private, reserved person, and an only child on top of that, and I thought for sure that I would feel self-conscious and uncomfortable around the people I'd live with. But instead it turned out to be one of the most interesting aspects of my stay in Durham, and for the most part, I enjoyed living with my flatmates. To a huge extent I think this was because of the cultural differences - I don't feel self-conscious around people from a completely different culture, apparently. And the food was great ;)
3) British food and British weather: don't quite deserve their bad rep. The cold, snowy winter was annoying but also great, spring and fall were quite sunny, and only this summer is a bit on the rainy side. It is much colder up in the north, though. British food could do with less beef and grease, and occasionally more spice, but mostly I liked it.
4) Uni: a lot more work-intensive and interesting than previous ERASMUS exchange students led me to believe. This was a good thing, because I'm usually happy when uni forces me to work.
5) I didn't change much. Perhaps I'm too old for it already, but I don't think this year changed me much in the way I've seen it with some other people who went abroad and came back very different.
6) Lizzie, the girl from Heidelberg who also went to Durham this year, and who in the beginning I didn't like very much, pretty much became my best friend here. We might have become even closer friends if she hadn't met Alex, her English girlfriend, but still it was good to have a replacement for the very close friends I have at home (I'm not very good with loose acquaintances).
7) The fact that there WAS a language barrier and I did feel like a foreigner a lot - in fact, I have never felt so German while living in Germany. Not in a bad way, as I said, I enjoy cultural differences and I was often amused and surprised by the things people knew and said about Germany (or in the case of my flatmates, Europe and the Western World). I think I now understand immigrants a lot better, which is never a bad thing.
Regrets
1) Of course to some extent I wish I hadn't gone to England this year. I could have gone last year, or the year before that, and my father wouldn't have died while I was away. I also deeply regret that I didn't call him more often, or say nicer things to him when I did. I don't grieve anymore, but the regrets will stay.
2) I wish I had made more of an effort to befriend people who weren't Elisabeth and my flatmates, because once uni stopped, I hardly had any contact to actual English people. And I might have found someone to travel with more.
3) I wish I had learned Mandarin, which I totally could have done, since Durham offers beginners courses. What a missed opportunity!
4) I wish I had gone to a proper college formal, and got a rental gown for the one event at the beginning of the year where I could have worn one.
5) As the year went on, I started regretting my decision to go to Durham a bit - maybe I should have listened to the people who told me to go to London (not least of all my boss, who lived there for nearly a decade before going back to Germany). I've grown very fond of the North, but if I could choose again, I would pick London.
Fond memories
1) I'll always fondly remember my first trip to Edinburgh in winter, and the trips to London I made this spring, the two days in Bath, the Isle of Skye, the long walks I took in Durham county, the evening walks through Durham with my flatmates, eating lunch by the river or with Lizzie in Gregg's bakery...
2) My attempts to participate in Durham's nightlife, from the Gamesoc socials to that first time I tried to go out with my flatmates (their shocked expressions at the noise level in a disco!) or Europe's Worst Nightclub and the stupid fooling around with Elisabeth's flatmate whose name I still don't know, but also the tea and cookie Wednesday nights at the international students meetings.
3) The two special topic courses and their great atmosphere, which were some of the nicest uni experiences I've had.
4) My room - tiny, and rather ugly without decoration, but I felt so very comfortable here. It somehow felt more like I owned this room than living at home has ever done - probably because I paid the rent ;)
5) Brilliant Asian homecooked food, from the giant feast that was Chinese New Year to weird unidentifiable herbal remedies and soups that made my mouth tingle for hours. I wish I could have reciprocated better, but unfortunately most of the stuff I CAN cook is mediterranean rather than German. I don't know how often I had lasagna this year...
6) Just generally living in England - thanks to fandom and British television and studying English Lit, it's a country that I knew and loved before ever coming here, and sometimes the smallest things would make me happy just because they were British.
I'll leave you with a (very random) piece of Geordie wisdom - the local dialect, not the guy from TNG - which I can transcribe only insufficiently because it's best shouted while drunk:
Shy bairns get nowt.
Unexpected things
1) I was sure that I would be homesick often and badly, and that I would have to work hard to keep myself happy. Mainly that's because of Australia, and the way things went there, but now more than ever I think that what went wrong in Australia must have been depression caused by actual physiological/hormonal stuff, rather than homesickness. Because here I didn't feel homesick once. Occasionally I wished my friends were around, or had a sudden longing to see my pets, but I never thought 'I want to go home so badly, nothing else matters'. I was as content here as I am at home when I'm feeling good and happy.
2) Living with strangers was not at all a problem for me. I'm a very private, reserved person, and an only child on top of that, and I thought for sure that I would feel self-conscious and uncomfortable around the people I'd live with. But instead it turned out to be one of the most interesting aspects of my stay in Durham, and for the most part, I enjoyed living with my flatmates. To a huge extent I think this was because of the cultural differences - I don't feel self-conscious around people from a completely different culture, apparently. And the food was great ;)
3) British food and British weather: don't quite deserve their bad rep. The cold, snowy winter was annoying but also great, spring and fall were quite sunny, and only this summer is a bit on the rainy side. It is much colder up in the north, though. British food could do with less beef and grease, and occasionally more spice, but mostly I liked it.
4) Uni: a lot more work-intensive and interesting than previous ERASMUS exchange students led me to believe. This was a good thing, because I'm usually happy when uni forces me to work.
5) I didn't change much. Perhaps I'm too old for it already, but I don't think this year changed me much in the way I've seen it with some other people who went abroad and came back very different.
6) Lizzie, the girl from Heidelberg who also went to Durham this year, and who in the beginning I didn't like very much, pretty much became my best friend here. We might have become even closer friends if she hadn't met Alex, her English girlfriend, but still it was good to have a replacement for the very close friends I have at home (I'm not very good with loose acquaintances).
7) The fact that there WAS a language barrier and I did feel like a foreigner a lot - in fact, I have never felt so German while living in Germany. Not in a bad way, as I said, I enjoy cultural differences and I was often amused and surprised by the things people knew and said about Germany (or in the case of my flatmates, Europe and the Western World). I think I now understand immigrants a lot better, which is never a bad thing.
Regrets
1) Of course to some extent I wish I hadn't gone to England this year. I could have gone last year, or the year before that, and my father wouldn't have died while I was away. I also deeply regret that I didn't call him more often, or say nicer things to him when I did. I don't grieve anymore, but the regrets will stay.
2) I wish I had made more of an effort to befriend people who weren't Elisabeth and my flatmates, because once uni stopped, I hardly had any contact to actual English people. And I might have found someone to travel with more.
3) I wish I had learned Mandarin, which I totally could have done, since Durham offers beginners courses. What a missed opportunity!
4) I wish I had gone to a proper college formal, and got a rental gown for the one event at the beginning of the year where I could have worn one.
5) As the year went on, I started regretting my decision to go to Durham a bit - maybe I should have listened to the people who told me to go to London (not least of all my boss, who lived there for nearly a decade before going back to Germany). I've grown very fond of the North, but if I could choose again, I would pick London.
Fond memories
1) I'll always fondly remember my first trip to Edinburgh in winter, and the trips to London I made this spring, the two days in Bath, the Isle of Skye, the long walks I took in Durham county, the evening walks through Durham with my flatmates, eating lunch by the river or with Lizzie in Gregg's bakery...
2) My attempts to participate in Durham's nightlife, from the Gamesoc socials to that first time I tried to go out with my flatmates (their shocked expressions at the noise level in a disco!) or Europe's Worst Nightclub and the stupid fooling around with Elisabeth's flatmate whose name I still don't know, but also the tea and cookie Wednesday nights at the international students meetings.
3) The two special topic courses and their great atmosphere, which were some of the nicest uni experiences I've had.
4) My room - tiny, and rather ugly without decoration, but I felt so very comfortable here. It somehow felt more like I owned this room than living at home has ever done - probably because I paid the rent ;)
5) Brilliant Asian homecooked food, from the giant feast that was Chinese New Year to weird unidentifiable herbal remedies and soups that made my mouth tingle for hours. I wish I could have reciprocated better, but unfortunately most of the stuff I CAN cook is mediterranean rather than German. I don't know how often I had lasagna this year...
6) Just generally living in England - thanks to fandom and British television and studying English Lit, it's a country that I knew and loved before ever coming here, and sometimes the smallest things would make me happy just because they were British.
I'll leave you with a (very random) piece of Geordie wisdom - the local dialect, not the guy from TNG - which I can transcribe only insufficiently because it's best shouted while drunk:
Shy bairns get nowt.